Help a Kid Help

In the workshop I am planning for counseling professionals, I will present a supplementary tool for helping kids do some detective work.  This work is for the purpose of helping a youngster find out how he or she can be of service in the family.  It provides them with a sure guide to parent, grandparents and siblings hearts.

All you need is four blank copies of (not lined, but just the type of paper used for printing stuff out on).  Fold them in half together and staple near the back.  You’re just making a small book.

Now on the cover page, write “Agent____________”.  Of course, you know the child’s name will be in the bank.

Inside the cover page, write

“Mom smiles a lot when I

1. ________________________



On the opposite page, you may have the child do a drawing of mom smiling or them doing something together.

On the next page, write “Three things I can tell she doesn’t like are




On the next page, write “Three ways I can give her a break and not do this myself are




Now, to make sure the child is not intimidated with the thought of being a complete angel and working himself half to death, we make sure to talk about the number of times a positive action can be taken.  Let’s say he or she can refuse to scream in the house one to three times a day.

Okay, on the next page, write “Three things that really make my Dad look happy are




By this point, you know where to go with it.  Construction of the book will depend on the composition of the child’s family.  More and more kids are living with a grandparent.  Some live with foster parents.

The main thing to keep in mind is that is someone has documentation of a family member’s likes and dislikes, it can be very easy to pick out a way to do them a service.  This not only helps a child know how to pay someone respect, but is also serves to reduce stress.  People tend to like people who take the time to make life a little easier.


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